


we’ll bury our ghosts so deep they’ll never find them

by copperiisulfate



Series: Comrades [1]
Category: K (Anime)
Genre: Conversations, Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-27
Updated: 2014-01-27
Packaged: 2018-01-10 05:28:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1155660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/copperiisulfate/pseuds/copperiisulfate
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"It happened before you came here," Hidaka tells him. "Surely, you’ve heard about it. Everyone has heard about it."</p><p>"Kusuhara Takeru," Fushimi says, without any particular inflection.</p>
            </blockquote>





	we’ll bury our ghosts so deep they’ll never find them

**Author's Note:**

> mentions of secondary character deaths; set post-ep13 with brief spoilers for the K Side:Blue novel.

 

"It happened before you came here," Hidaka tells him. "Surely, you’ve heard about it. Everyone has heard about it."

"Kusuhara Takeru," Fushimi says, without any particular inflection. 

"Most people didn’t know who he was though, or who he really was at any rate. He was new, eager to learn. He was smart, funny, really kind."

Fushimi lies beside him, stares at the ceiling, silent.

"He was my best friend. First real friend in the squad, I think."

"Why are you telling me this? Why now?" Fushimi says. "I’m sorry for your loss. What else do you want me to say?"

"Nothing. I just—I wanted you to know. He was important to me. Would have wanted you to meet him," and Hidaka laughs, at some far-off memory or the like. "He could probably have made you smile. Yes, even you. He made everyone smile, from the Captain to all the old cranky higher-ups that everyone was terrified of, like Zenjou Gouki," and then, after another beat of silence. "I know you think about him sometimes. A lot of the time. Your best friend."

"That is not—" Fushimi starts, suddenly agitated.

"—not the same, I know. Or my business, I know. But they were both loyal to their kings. You ever think maybe it was a good thing for your friend that his king died before he was able to take a bullet for him?"

And now it is Hidaka who sounds disturbingly impassive. Fushimi turns to look at him.

"I didn’t wish death upon Suoh Mikoto. I wasn’t a fan but I wouldn’t—"

"I know you wouldn’t," Hidaka agrees. "He was your king too, once, and it’s awful, really, what kings have to bear, but if it was him or your friend—"

"Would  _you_  have rather had Captain die over your friend?”

It’s a stupid fucking question in response to Hidaka’s stupid fucking question and they both know it. He’d pick Misaki over any king of any kind a hundred times over but he’s also well aware that he’s not the paradigm of humanity and he doesn’t want to think that Hidaka is anything like—would be anything like him. 

Hidaka shakes his head. “I want to say no. I want to say I would probably have taken his place if I had been brave enough, loyal enough, to move like that, unthinkingly and in a heartbeat. But I wasn’t him so I guess it’s not important now. Besides,” and it’s next to unheard of to get a wry laugh out of Hidaka but here it is, followed by, “Captain wouldn’t have died from a bullet.”

Fushimi feels suddenly exhausted, doesn’t want to bother pointing out that  _that wasn’t the question_  but his mind goes to the Captain and his crisp, clean electric-blue flames, a stark contrast against the swirling whirlpool of chaos that was Suoh Mikoto and his power, sucking everyone, everything inwards and downwards.

 _Misaki_.

Fushimi’s mind goes to a faded mark above his collarbone which still  _burns_ and he doesn’t understand it, goes to the sight of great and terrifying swords in the sky, and he feels a shiver course through his whole body. He turns towards Hidaka and it’s a cross between a whisper and a hiss when he says, “Can you talk about something else?”

Hidaka looks contemplative. “Fuse’s birthday’s coming up. Not that you care, but—”

"No, I don’t, but I’m going to get sucked into whatever your friends are planning so I might as well stay informed."

Hidaka smiles, brushes back a stand of Fushimi’s hair from his face. “They’d be your friends too, if you’d let them.”

"That’s unnecessary," Fushimi scowls. "Don’t care to make my co-workers like me."

" _I_ like you."

"You’re different. A little messed up in the head probably."

Hidaka chuckles. “Probably,” And then, “Guess I’m messed up enough that I’ll say it out loud, that I’d also like you to let yourself be happy.”

Fushimi winces but doesn’t flinch away, and it’s enough of a sign that whatever Hidaka’s doing is pushing it but still hasn’t crossed the kind of line that would get him in real trouble. “Stop talking like Captain,” Fushimi sighs.

"Maybe he’s right. Everyone knows that he likes you too."

"He’s also messed up and that’s not even a secret."

Hidaka laughs, soft, “Works for you though.”

"Not funny," Fushimi says, doesn’t like to think about the corollary, that everyone’s got to be a little fucked up to want to bother keeping him around. He sighs, sounding exasperated and impatient. "I have to be up in four hours and if you have nothing further to contribute…"

"You know you could have kicked me out of your room two hours ago. You still can."

"What’s your point?"

Hidaka closes the space between them, presses a kiss to the underside of his jaw and murmurs, “Not important. You wouldn’t own up to it anyway.”

"Tell me."

"I’m sorry for whatever you left behind but I’m not sorry you came here and I don’t think you are either when it comes down to it."

Fushimi sighs, surprises himself when he says: “And why wouldn’t I own up to it?”

"Because that would mean admitting you’re starting to let yourself be happy." Hidaka smiles, says, "Don’t worry. Go to sleep. You have to be up in four hours."

 


End file.
